Category Archives: SEPS Reviews

SEPS Review: Bad Boys (1995)

Marcus, I just have one question for ya bro. How the hell you gonna leave my ass at a gun fight to go get the car!

— Mike Lowrey

Bad Boys is probably the only movie of Michael Bay’s that I actually liked a lot. I used to watch a burned copy of the movie when it was on rotation of HBO a couple of years ago. The guys at SEPS were playing this movie numerous times and I would be giddy with excitement watching this movie. I know almost every single line in this movie. Is it the end all, be all of buddy action movies? No, but it’s a helluva ride.

The story centers on a pair of Miami narcotic cops, the sexually frustrated Marcus Burnett (Martin Lawrence) and the trust fund playboy, Mike Lowery (Will Smith) who are reeling from a break-in at their precinct. A hundred million dollars worth of heroin is stolen when an ex-cop Eddie Dominguez (Emmanuel Xuereb) lets the bad guy, Fouchet (Tchéky Karyo) to get into the vault. Their boss, Captain Howard (Joe Pantanliano) wants the guys to get the dope back quickly before Alison Sinclair (Marg Helgenberger) would find any excuse to shut the station down.

Eddie becomes greedy when he takes a couple of blocks of the heroin and has a private spending spree. Mike’s friend who happens to be an escort, Max (Karen Alexander) is invited to party with Eddie in his Al Capone suite. She brings her friend, Julie (Téa Leoni) along. They wasn’t the best decision, because Fouchet barges in the suite with guns blazing. Takes down Eddie and Max. Julie manages to escape.

Showing up at the scene, Mike is distraught that his friend was lying under the sheet. He tries to find the person that killed her by himself. When Mike is away from his desk, Julie calls the precinct. She insists to talk to Mike Lowery only, but Marcus is the only one there. The Captain asks Marcus to pretend to be Mike to secure the only surviving witness before Fouchet’s men come knocking on her door.

The rest of the movie is like a comedy of errors when the two cops try to keep up with the charade of the living the each person’s home life in order to keep Julie from blowing town.

I believe this was the first movie I ever saw with two black male leads playing cops instead being criminals. It might have struck a cord with me that two black men could be the good guys for once. Knowing Michael Bay, he loves to have the explosions, women in scantily clad outfits and often ridiculous dialogue. That is his signature with all of his movies. I enjoyed this movie for basic entertainment value. The lines of dialogue are memorable. I could name a dozen of them, but I don’t want to bore you.

Judgment: A likable action movie with equally likable leads.

Rating: ***1/2

SEPS Review: Gone in 60 Seconds (2000)

 

Before I start my review, I would like to preface this by saying that I missed reviewing movies. As many of you know, I was away at Navy boot camp for a while. I was discharged from it because my eyes were too fucked up to effectively do my job, which was supposed to be an air traffic controller. I was in a place called SEPS, which is out of basic training. The guys there are being transitioned out. Not training, there was A LOT of downtime. I’m glad that had movies to pass the mind numbing boredom. I was there for over a month. I’m glad to be back. I’m missed you guys. Let’s get started. Shall we? 

Let’s just say that the picking were slim in SEPS. the first movie I ever saw in SEPS was the Nicolas Cage vehicle, Gone in 60 Seconds. I have seen bits and pieces of the movie over the years. I never had the chance to watch it, because I was stuck there I checked it out. This movie was like The Fast and the Furious, but less fun. 

Apparently this movie is a remake of a 1974 movie that I haven’t heard of. I supposed that it had the same basic premise except this version was updated with fast cars and lots of hot women. Whatever. The movie centers around a retired thief, Memphis Raines (Nicolas Cage) is pulled back into the car stealing business when a British crime boss, Raymond Calitri (Christopher Eccleston). Calitri threatens to kill his younger brother, Kip (Giovanni Ribsi) who botched an earlier job. The only way that Memphis could save his brother is to steal fifty cars on a list. 

With the clock ticking down, Memphis gathers together his old crew including his mentor, Otto (Robert Duvall) and old love interest, Sway (Angelina Jolie). When the crew starts on the list, this catches the attention of LAPD Detective Roland Castlebeck (Delroy Lindo) who dealt with Raines and his tactics. Castlebeck tries to be one step ahead of Raines with his partner, Detective Drycoff (Timothy Olyphant). Raines tries to steal all the cars in a 24-hour period to try to get the deadline. 

I wish that I could pontificate more about this movie, but the movie is a shallow action film that doesn’t satisfy you. I am perfectly fine with the anti-hero. I hate the typical cookie cutter endings to a movie. I was mildly enjoying this film as brainless entertainment, but the ending bothered the hell out of me. 

Judgment: It was a cop-out. 

Rating: **1/2